Oh hey there,
Now, I know what you're thinking - that gal has finally lost the plot! However, bear with me.
I was training a group of managers this week on how to be a good listener, and we got talking about this brilliant metaphor: the pane of glass we each look through. It's stuck with me, and I think it might resonate with you too.
Every single one of us views the world through our very own, one-of-a-kind stained glass window. It's made up of all the experiences, memories, values, and beliefs that have shaped us along the way.
Think of it like this: while someone else's pane might be filled with warm, rosy tones of optimism, yours might be streaked with blues of introspection or vivid reds of determination. I know that my pane can totally change in hue depending upon the day and what's going on in my world. Therefore, it's important in itself that we all get clearer on what our pane is actually like!
But, I digress. No two panes are ever the same. So, when we’re trying to understand someone, we often forget they’re looking through their own pane, not ours. What seems crystal clear to us might look murky or completely different through their glass.
As managers then, one of the most crucial tools we can have in our arsenal is how we listen.
Listening isn't just hearing words - it’s about discovering the colours and patterns of someone else’s stained glass. When you listen to someone, your role isn’t to force your view through their pane but to learn about theirs. What’s shaped it? What makes it shimmer or crack? What are the experiences, hopes, and challenges that have painted their world?
To really 'get' someone, you have to approach every conversation with curiosity and openness. Here are a few ways to uncover the beauty of their unique glass:
- Don't assume: Ask questions to understand what they see and feel.
- Step back from your pane: It’s so tempting to project our own colours and patterns onto others, but the magic happens when you set yours aside and fully tune into theirs.
- Acknowledge their view: Sometimes, just recognising their unique perspective is enough to make someone feel truly seen and heard. “I hadn’t thought about it that way before,” can work wonders.
- Share - don't overpower: When it’s time to share your own perspective, do it gently. Don’t try to make your pane the “right” one - just let it complement theirs.
When you listen with the intention of learning about someone else’s stained glass, the world becomes a kaleidoscope of possibilities. You see things you’ve never seen before, perspectives you couldn’t imagine, and experiences you’ve never lived. Indeed, it's how some of the very best and most creative ideas are formed!
This is what makes listening such an art, and why I love helping people develop this skill. Here’s to becoming explorers of human panes and making every connection a little brighter.
If you think your team might benefit from workplace coaching, to help them communicate and understand each other better, take a look at our training programmes.
Have a lovely week, team!
Cate
Oh hey there,
Now, I know what you're thinking - that gal has finally lost the plot! However, bear with me.
I was training a group of managers this week on how to be a good listener, and we got talking about this brilliant metaphor: the pane of glass we each look through. It's stuck with me, and I think it might resonate with you too.
Every single one of us views the world through our very own, one-of-a-kind stained glass window. It's made up of all the experiences, memories, values, and beliefs that have shaped us along the way.
Think of it like this: while someone else's pane might be filled with warm, rosy tones of optimism, yours might be streaked with blues of introspection or vivid reds of determination. I know that my pane can totally change in hue depending upon the day and what's going on in my world. Therefore, it's important in itself that we all get clearer on what our pane is actually like!
But, I digress. No two panes are ever the same. So, when we’re trying to understand someone, we often forget they’re looking through their own pane, not ours. What seems crystal clear to us might look murky or completely different through their glass.
As managers then, one of the most crucial tools we can have in our arsenal is how we listen.
Listening isn't just hearing words - it’s about discovering the colours and patterns of someone else’s stained glass. When you listen to someone, your role isn’t to force your view through their pane but to learn about theirs. What’s shaped it? What makes it shimmer or crack? What are the experiences, hopes, and challenges that have painted their world?
To really 'get' someone, you have to approach every conversation with curiosity and openness. Here are a few ways to uncover the beauty of their unique glass:
- Don't assume: Ask questions to understand what they see and feel.
- Step back from your pane: It’s so tempting to project our own colours and patterns onto others, but the magic happens when you set yours aside and fully tune into theirs.
- Acknowledge their view: Sometimes, just recognising their unique perspective is enough to make someone feel truly seen and heard. “I hadn’t thought about it that way before,” can work wonders.
- Share - don't overpower: When it’s time to share your own perspective, do it gently. Don’t try to make your pane the “right” one - just let it complement theirs.
When you listen with the intention of learning about someone else’s stained glass, the world becomes a kaleidoscope of possibilities. You see things you’ve never seen before, perspectives you couldn’t imagine, and experiences you’ve never lived. Indeed, it's how some of the very best and most creative ideas are formed!
This is what makes listening such an art, and why I love helping people develop this skill. Here’s to becoming explorers of human panes and making every connection a little brighter.
If you think your team might benefit from workplace coaching, to help them communicate and understand each other better, take a look at our training programmes.
Have a lovely week, team!
Cate
